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Sleep is crucial for both physical and mental well-being, especially for toddlers aged two and three. If your toddler is having bedtime tantrums, I know it can be tough on both of you. When sleep is disrupted, it’s easy to fall into a cycle of exhaustion and frustration that makes it even harder to manage these tantrums.
But I’ve got your back.
Understanding why these tantrums happen, how to prevent them, and how to handle them when they do occur is key to smoother bedtime experiences. I’ve put together thirteen tips to help you and your toddler through those bedtime struggles.
Key Takeaways
Bedtime can be a challenging time for toddlers.
Understanding the root cause of bedtime tantrums can help prevent them.
Creating a calming bedtime routine and sleep-friendly environment can ease your child into sleep.
Remaining calm during a tantrum can help your child regulate their emotions.
Engaging in activities that promote emotional regulation can help reduce tantrums.
6 Common Reasons for Toddler Bedtime Tantrums
Sometimes, your toddler’s resistance to bedtime might seem to come out of nowhere. One minute they’re happy, and the next, they’re in full meltdown mode. However, there are usually underlying reasons for these tantrums. By identifying the cause, you may be able to prevent or minimize these bedtime battles.
Illness If your toddler suddenly starts having trouble at bedtime, it might be due to illness. They could be dealing with a fever, ear infection, or some other discomfort. Addressing their discomfort may help resolve the tantrums, and once they’re feeling better, the tantrums should subside.
Sensory Sensitivity Some children are highly sensitive to sensory inputs. It could be that their pajamas are itchy, the room is too cold, or outside noises are disturbing them. Identifying and addressing these sensory issues can make bedtime smoother.
Separation Anxiety Toddlers may experience heightened anxiety about being separated from you at bedtime. Reassure your child that you’re nearby, perhaps by checking in on them after you leave or giving them something comforting, like a shirt of yours to sleep with.
Fear of the Dark Fear of the dark is a common issue for toddlers. A night light or leaving the door slightly open with a hall light on can help ease their fears.
Growing Independence As toddlers begin to assert their independence, they may resist bedtime as a way to express it. Offering limited choices during the bedtime routine, such as picking between two pairs of pajamas, can give them a sense of control while still guiding them toward bed.
Excess Energy Sometimes, toddlers simply aren’t tired at bedtime. Incorporating calming activities, such as yoga or a warm bath, can help them wind down and prepare for sleep.
4 Ways to Ease Bedtime Tantrums
Whether you’ve pinpointed the cause of your child’s bedtime struggles or not, establishing a consistent bedtime routine can make a significant difference. A predictable ritual can help your child know what to expect and signal that it’s time to wind down.
Create a Comforting Sleep Environment A cool, dark room is typically best for sleep, but every child has unique preferences. Experiment with soothing scents like lavender, calming music, or a sound machine. Blackout curtains and comfortable pajamas can also contribute to a more restful environment.
Limit Screen Time Before Bed Screens emit blue light, which can interfere with your child’s natural sleep cycle. Turning off screens at least an hour before bedtime can help their brain produce melatonin, making it easier for them to fall asleep.
Encourage Daytime Activity Physical activity during the day helps regulate your child’s internal clock, so they’re more likely to be ready for sleep at night. Aim for a few hours of energetic play each day, followed by quieter activities leading up to bedtime.
Stick to a Consistent Bedtime Routine A consistent routine with calming activities can signal to your child that it’s time for bed. This might include brushing teeth, taking a bath, reading a book, or singing a lullaby. The key is to keep it predictable and enjoyable for both of you.
3 Strategies for Managing Bedtime Tantrums
Even with the best preparation, bedtime tantrums can still happen. They’re a normal part of childhood and not necessarily a sign of deeper issues. Here’s how I suggest handling them:
Stay Calm It’s tough to stay calm when your child is throwing a tantrum, but your energy can influence theirs. Try to maintain a calm tone and body language, even if you need to intervene to keep your child safe.
Acknowledge Their Feelings Sometimes, simply acknowledging that you understand your child is upset can help de-escalate the situation. This validation can be the first step in helping them manage their emotions.
Allow the Tantrum to Run Its Course While it’s easier said than done, letting a tantrum resolve naturally can be beneficial. Ensure your child is safe, then use gentle, reassuring language to let them know it’s okay to feel upset. Over time, this approach can help them learn that tantrums won’t get them what they want.
Support for Temper Tantrums with Begin
No matter how well you plan, tantrums are bound to happen occasionally. It’s all part of the process. However, with a solid bedtime routine and the right support, you’re doing a great job as a parent.
Begin’s learning membership, developed in partnership with experts at Sesame Workshop, provides tools and techniques to help toddlers develop emotional regulation skills. Through hands-on and digital activities, your child can learn to manage their feelings better, making bedtime tantrums less frequent and easier to handle.
FREE Resource
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